College town, Friday night Our mess buried inside waiting like birds to be set free Some had tact Others melted in their storms As I did Recklessness, bordering on insanity Not new… Reaching for altered states like I was chasing spiritual gold
He wanted me to stay I was too sloshed to see My world swaying like brambles in the wind It felt slimy - wrong Greek symbols waning in and out A hovering shadow of a face the view exiting the womb Remembering rumors of roofies In that virtual reality - no fucks The worst that could happen I knew throwing myself away anyway
She stepped in Her thin frame, presence like a blade Sharp crystal blues long blonde hair A petite Paris Hilton in Uggs Same sharp twat sitting up in bed across from me interrogating me about my culture I froze No real answers it felt like I was failing a simple test She pressed on Watching me squirm As I grasped at air Like she had to make sure that I was indeed a lost lamb She taught me hers Pulled me in like someone not yet ready for the gap year to Israel I never felt out of place It was exactly where I needed to be
Our dorm with the two E's and Sarah Down the hall Best times wrapped in Pink Floyd and a clean bong Our hazy Woodstock… Nirvana… Too cool for me
One night Fiona Apple on full blast Finals week She put the speaker right against the door Staying the course through 3am Urgent knocking Then Pounding As Fiona kills us softly “You get it” “No” She had a point The racket was unbearable all week Judgment day - that's hot
She wouldn't leave me there In that oddly bright room Some clear liquid in front of us And a random guy Even as I swatted her away - I'll be fine Taking another shot, probably Definitely Determined to die We walked out - safe Probably the best person I knew
I wouldn't know a good thing even if it slapped me in the face
True to me I ran the opposite way Trying to fit in places I didn't belong I wanted a home that l o o k e d like me Only to abandon Me
Years down the road Same deal, different spaces Classy bars, bespoke cocktails, bigger playing field "You're still the same" As my world tipped She walked with me Catching crisp winter air to Bryant Park’s Winter Village It’s for the memories
Layered Fragments, Becoming Whole 